The past few weeks have left me thinking about mamas and how sometimes we feel like things can divide us - economics, parenting styles, our homes...guilt, inferiority complexes or hubris - not to mention the flood of cultural messages on what a mother should be and do.
Whether its a mother losing her patience in the check out line or an apparent wonder mom, seems it can be hard to look past the exterior and really try to see the woman standing in front of us. A mother plain and clear, possessing that fierce love and all the ups and downs and in betweens that come along with that kind of fire. Doing what she does in her own style or the best way she can muster up at the moment.
Here is a little something I've been trying to focus on:
Supporting each other whether its in the check out line of the grocery store while the mama in front has her hands full with a tantruming toddler or dropping off some dinners for a family who just needs a hand. Its all good, all true and all "so" neccessary, ya think? Seems it also might have something to do with feeling good about where we are and what we're doing then sending out that sunshine.
I was in the line at The Dollar Store once - yes, The Dollar Store...and one of my kiddos was just having one of those absolute fits - you know the really hair raising ones...Anyway, this woman behind me was watching as I was trying to talk my DD through her storm and she was just smiling...a really sweet smile too. After a bit she said, "You're doing a great job..." and that one little bit of support (aside from nearly bringing me to tears right then and there because inside...things were starting to feel just a little snippy) really made a difference. It gave me the extra juice I needed to keep talking the little one through her moment (or minutes...or maybe it was an hour ;)
Also, just a few things I wanted to touch base on real quick ;)
* I do like to clean - believe it or not...really! When my husband takes the kids some Sundays to his parents; its me, the baby and an all out war on the dustbunnies. I'm not talking a few hours, this is an all day event with battles on all fronts. Where does it get me? A clean house to go to sleep by and tripping over bionicles and wooden animals for the rest of the week but in the end so worth it...
It may be this:
My kids play - a lot. And they play in the living room - all the time. With 3 kiddos sharing a 13x10 room, that doesn't leave much playroom so they haul it on out into the living/dining room. And they are never done ;) You know that, "But I'm still using it!" response you get when its time to pick up? Yeah, like I said, they like to play.
*Stuff - and we have too much of it. Really, we do. And I have been wondering who are these toys for anyway? Them or myself, lol.
Resolutions?
* Moving along the stuff - we will be taking a good hard look at what actually is played with and what is just here because, frankly, I like the look of it ;)
Well, there are, of course, more reasons than this but we'll save those for another time - a little something to look forward to if you will.
What about simplicity?
Well, that's all a matter of perspective I guess...we have a small home that doesn't use up many resources to keep it warm and fill it up with accessories to a nice coziness. BUT - the amount of mental and physical resources that go into maintaining a smaller space with this many people living in it, I find are pretty big. For us, its a constant evaluation of the space and how we use it.
For instance:
My truly wonderful husband thinks its perfectly reasonable to hang tools that he knows he will be using soon - ON THE WALL OF THE LIVINGROOM... Needless to say - this doesn't fly.
Just thought I'd share that bit of reality ;)
